Monday, April 9, 2007

A League of Her Own

Alright, I apologize for the lack of updates over the Easter Weekend. If there's one thing I hate, it's how all internet updates (or most) stop during the holidays. Of course I understand it, but it just sucks. But the fact of the matter is, I've just had nothing to write about over the weekend. My easter weekend's been pretty good. Saw SharkWater which was good and bad. Lots of good things in it - but not sure about that narration. Ah well, still worth a look.

Anyway, as such, I still really have no update today either. So I'll do the easy cop out and just port over one of my posts from my old myspace blog. Enjoy and thanks for reading.

A League of her own...

You know, you go through life accomplishing a lot of just building your confidence and stature and succeeding at everything. I'm not trying to sound cocky or boastful here - but I'm damn proud of everything I've accomplished - my work with film, my work with music, my grades in school, my breakdancing and free-running - heck I'm even pretty happy with my personality. And of course I'm not for everybody - there's a lot of people who hate me out there - but I don't care, no one's loved by everyone.

You go through life and your head is up high and you think - I'm a pretty decent guy and deserve anybody that comes my way. Even though everybody might not be my taste - I at least go through life thinking I deserve any one of them. There are times where of course I've been rejected - but in the end I always end up saying - y'know what, you deserve better and those who reject you are just trash and don't deserve you.

But then it hits you.

Every now and then - and although it's happened twice this year - it happens very seldomly. And it pretty much kills you:

You actually meet someone who truly is out of your league.

You tell yourself the old cliche that I just mentioned about deserving better, but time and time again you start to find out more about these people and realize that - wow - they really do deserve better than yourself. I've met 2 girls in the past year that I truly feel this way about. Now again - don't get me wrong - I'm not down on myself and am not feeling sorry for myself. I really do think I'm a pretty frickin' amazing person. But let's face it - they really do exist - girls that deserve better. All I'm saying is that it sucks sometimes. Why am I writing about it now? Well, tell you the truth, for some unknown reason - I just woke up thinking about one of them this morning - and thought - man that sucks!

I think what's worse sometimes, is that because they are such great people - they're never really mean or jerkish to you, and they never lead you on, etc. Like - you basically have nothing to be mad at them about. All you have is the situation to be mad at. Bascially to sit in your bed in the morning at think - man - this kinda sucks.

But I guess there's always the bright side. And I truly believe in this - it's not some kind of self-consolation. I'm talking about the revelation that these people give you - they reveal to you that people like them exist in the real world. You start to think sometimes that your standards are too high, but then these people always validate them for you - and in the end, despite the sucky feeling - you're usually overcome with the feeling and notion that it was a privilege to even meet them. They'll never be in your life again to any significant extent, but at least you got to know an amazing person who'll do amazing things in this world. They're out of your league, sure, but all it does it force you to be a better person.

Or at least that's how I feel. Thanks for reading.


Anonymous said...

Man, that post struck me as very true. I don't think it's a common experience, but there are some girls who can turn you down, and at the same time leave you feeling really good about yourself, and the world, and everything.

Very cool.

cli23 said...

Cool, glad to know people out there agree. And thanks for reading man.